The meta model was created as a result of studying questions asked in therapy, and figuring out why some questions were more effective than others.
As it seems, the Meta Model is not really just a model utilizing questions. They are literally questions that are focused on getting a meta view of a model - something that is worth learning about.
In our mental models, we have a number of filters. They include our beliefs, memories, language, meta programs, values structure, etc.
Language, as it seems, has a deep structure and surface structure. When I say “I throw the ball into the hoop”, we are not so interested in the action as in the sequence of mental patterns that lead to the ball going into the hoop.
As such, we need to figure out the person’s belief patterns, values system, representational system and sequence (e.g. I see the ball going into the hoop and allow the ball to be lifted on one hand and released in a slow, backward rotating fashion on my third finger). Even that explanation has a lot of deletions and missing information that will be crucial to effective modeling.
Some of the questions you will ask are to identify distortion, generalization and deletion patterns.
Distortions
R. They are evil people because they torture animals.
Q. How does torturing people mean they are evil people?
Generalizations
R. All men are scum
Q. Has there been a man who has not been scum?
Deletion
R. Nobody listens to me.
Q. What does listening mean to you?
It’s the nature of the questions that determine the effectiveness of your modeling process. If you decide to model the problem, you will gain insight into the way they structured the problem. If you decide to model excellence, you will find potential solutions. I recommend finding out what is appropriate.
I get rather fed up people thinking that NLP is about motivation and success and stuff. If you want to learn about that, you can go to Anthony Robbins and The Law Of Attraction stuff.
If you want to learn real NLP stuff, you gotta learn from the guys who are the most creative in developing new NLP models like Bandler, La Valle, Dilts, Grinder, Steve and Connierae Andreas among others.
If you have jumped to conclusions about what NLP is without even having learn anything in detail about NLP, please get it in your mental dictionary that NLP is none of those things.
I keep emphasizing that NLP is about modeling. Anthony Robbins modeled the process of motivation, creating his own application called neuro-associative conditioning. Even the founders utilized the core of NLP to create therapeutic techniques. Persuasion is NOT NLP. It’s just an application.
Calling NLP persuasion is like calling a piano R&B. It just doesn’t make sense. One is the instrument. The other is the genre. It’s like calling a brick a house. One is the building block, the other is the structure, based on a blueprint.
Personally, I believe that NLP is the essential DNA for studying human behavior. You can study human mediocrity, or you can study human excellence. Sometimes, you may have to do both.
NLP has a nice framework of understanding people’s behaviors. It has a theory to understanding how human beings communicate and think. I believe that communication is a representation of thought, and being able to understand communication opens up the understanding of thought processes.
Once I can gain access to thought processes, I can learn then, repeat them, discover new possible pathways, and then teach those processes to people who can help me to reach my goals.
Representational Systems
We first understand that structures within the human system include the way we represent information. If I can find someone who is, say, great at persuading, I can find out how they do it.
It will follow a process that begins with an element in the surrounding environment that triggers off a sequence of thought patterns, emotional reactions and actual behaviors. We call those the operations.
Questions
But it’s the kinds of questions you ask that lead you to the direction you need. Most people start off with the wrong question (usually - “how the heck did you do that”). Instead, you should be asking about how that strategy works. You don’t open up a watch and ask “how the heck does it do that”. You find out the mechanism and structure that corresponds with a certain result that it achieves.
Likewise, look at people and figure out patterns and processes. Most people who do not have the right questions or understanding of representational processes will not be able to this fast enough.
The questions come from the core model of NLP known as the Meta Model. It has evolved quite a fair bit since it first was developed, but the core principle is about understanding the deep structure of human experience.
My advice is to look at models. Consider who could be your role models. No they don’t have to be perfect, but must have some kind of skill or result you want to develop in yourself. Learn the Meta Model and the strategy modeling process.
One thing in NLP is that the focus on the attitude of success is hardly mentioned. People keep focusing on the techniques and the method, and I think that’s a little passe.
One principle I share in the success process is about giving 100%.
A number of people have asked me about giving 100% and what that really means. While this is not strictly an NLP strategy, I think the attitude of being at your 100% is very important. Personally, I find that it is a very useful concept. But, is it possible to give 100% all the time?
Hm.
When you set your goals, do you think that it is an important thing to put in 100% to achieve your goals?
Even if you have the best skills and techniques, you may not necessarily achieve your goals simply because you did not put in your best. If you want something, you may want to put limitations aside.
Of course, if you are in an environment, you may also find that you are restricted by culture, the way people do things. When you are in conflict as to whether you should put in your best, you have to ask yourself the question: what will be beneficial overall?
Have you realized that some of the top performers actually defy the norms in order to push themselves to the highest possible level of performance? Perhaps, holding back is not really an option anymore!
Consider, though, that it’s no longer about what you do, but rather how you communicate your intent. It’s probably the best, therefore, if you wish to get yourself to stretch or even get other people to stretch, that your intent is clearly communicated so that you and the stakeholders of your decisions are clear about your intent first.
I recently came to the conclusion that to be successful, you have to be well-structured and clear. Isn’t that the case? Structure has favored the person in school and in their career. The top student is the most organized. The top executive is the one who systematically plays by all the corporate rules. To a point.
I believe it is as much a possibility to model after a simple skill like this - but take someone who has never had any structure and expect them to fit into it… and you have a madhouse!
I think we can start simply. Look at the stuff that’s happening around you. If you find yourself disorganized, start categorizing. It takes a little bit of effort, as I found, to be able to do this! A lot of the stuff that I have just didn’t fit in. Actually, I didn’t really know what to do with them.
If your stuff is out of place and you don’t know what to do with them, there’s a tendency to… just leave them there!
That’s the start of clutter. What you have to do is then create a series of Swish Patterns in order to create a shift in the way you respond to your misplaced stuff. That way, you will be more likely to respond in a manner OTHER than just leaving things lying around.
Another thing that I observed is this: since clutter actually is the accumulation of things that don’t belong, you should see the changes when you activate those neurological shifts. See the result in a week or two.
Summary of steps:
Step 1: have a clear idea of what should belong and what shouldn’t
Step 2: decide that you either have a place for it or you don’t.
If you have a place for it, make the mental connection and place it where it belongs.
If you don’t have a place for it, create one called “trash bin”.
Step 3: reduce your tolerance for clutter.
If what you see as clutter has a high tolerance level (say 8/10 or higher), take the same image and change the image so that it becomes a 2/10 or so. Now, your brain is primed to expect a lower level of tolerance and kick start the process of clearing.
Step 4: future pace and check ecology, especially if you end up clearing other people’s clutter, which they may not like.
I’ve heard this before in the book by Daniel Goleman called “Destructive Emotions”. We habituate our thoughts through our environment. In one of my YouTube videos, I talked about Triggers. Environment and memory create our somewhat autonomous reactions to sensory triggers. If you were nearly killed in a fire, you would probably have a reaction to fire around you, whether it be adverse or not.
Our past experiences end up giving us access to opportunities. But the problem with many people is that they seriously lack awareness of their habitual performances. I’ve mentioned in one of my seminars before that being more aware of yourself opens up opportunity for improvement. Your habits could trap you or lead you to excellence. It’s merely a question of what kind of habits you build for yourself.
So… do we really need 10,000 hours to build a skill?
My personal opinion is that 10,000 hours is necessary as a foundational step. If you have NO skill, or have not been practicing anything to improve yourself, there’s going to be a general lack of positive regard for what you do and the meaning behind it.
Your ability to feel that what you are doing is challenging and fulfilling will lead to something called “passion”. I suppose that’s one of the reasons why people think that it’s hard to “find” your passion. You simply haven’t looked at the right places yet! When you start something and begin to enhance your capacity to do that something well (e.g. swim, run, read, write) you end up developing opportunities.
It is these opportunities that will give you new skills to learn and new people to meet. This then offers the higher chance of becoming highly successful in what you do. I like to think of myself as a portal to opportunity. I’ll help bring people to the doors, but they have to walk in there themselves.
Millionaires can be made.
Experts can be created.
The question is… which one comes first: the millionaire or the expert?
I think you probably know the answer to this. It’s your expertise that brings you the millions. If you have no expertise, even if you received a million dollars, it’s going to disappear!
The funny thing is this: after your first 10,000 hours, the next skill or expertise you need to have doesn’t take that long. Possibly 9,000 hours. The more you learn, the less you HAVE to learn later.
Why?
Because domains of knowledge overlap with each other and you can be sure that this is the rule, not the exception. If you don’t have the learning capacity, you are in serious trouble. Others who have this learning edge will stay ahead of the curve and will force you to arrive at a conclusion that you’re too late.
It’s never too late! By being a student and learning, you might actually start finding it addictive. Learn more, build more capacity, increase your awarenss and you’ll find opportunities abound. Take those opportunities and you’ll see success coming in!
Don’t get hoodwinked into the outcome. Study the processes, and you’ll realize how the journey in life actually is more enriching than you think. Found this on Mark Nolan’s “http://www.morejoyinlife.com/”
I was in a taxicab earlier this week and had the opportunity to listen to my government talk about interesting training incentives for literally everyone. Of course I was happy! It seemed to me that this was exactly what I needed to hear, especially since I’m in the business of training.
The cab driver wasn’t so hot on the news. He said “it’s useless”. What he wanted was a handout - extra cash. All the training, he said, was a waste of time.
Woah!
I can tell why HE’s the one driving the cab now!
If you can imagine for one second that the entire country was like this? That everyone was looking only for handouts rather than to build something of their own. It’s all a question of taking responsibility for one’s current situation.
To take responsibility, it’s necessary to observe the current “ownership” level you have now. Remember - I’m not saying “it’s your fault”. I’m saying take ownership so that you don’t have to point fingers.
Step 1: Think of something in your life that isn’t going right. Disassociate.
Step 2: Ask yourself what you needed in order for that to go right. Remember to take this from the standpoint of ownership rather than blame. If you had to do it all over, what skills and resources would you need?
Step 3: Imagine a future scenario where you were in a similar situation but with the appropriate skills and resources. Would your reflection in Step 2 be sufficient, or do you need more resources? Go back to step 2.
Step 4: Create a list of steps you need to do in order to ensure you come up to speed. It may be taking action on a skill you must build, or a commitment you must act upon, etc.
Step 5: See yourself doing it, then start doing it!
Looking for an NLP Trainer in Singapore? Well, you probably should get in touch with me. I’ve been probably the longest training NLP Trainer in this part of the world, 15 years of training experience, a REAL background in psychotherapy, counseling and linguistics with several REAL accolades (I’m a best selling author, a recognized authority in training in Singapore) to back me up (not just theory). If you’re keen to receive authentic and expansive NLP training in Singapore, look me up and we’ll chat about how your certification and licensing could bring you a long way.
If you are in another part of the world, I’m still waiting for people to bring me over… wherever you are! *hint hint*
Do you desire financial freedom and fame? If you do, I have news for you. NLP can help you model after those successes! However, you might have a lot of catching up the, not just in financial success, but also in terms of knowing where you are where you ought to go. If you’re one of those people who have great financial success, but are complete jerks, don’t read this. I have people whom I care about whom I want to succeed, not you.
So guys… you want success. Yet, some people have great financial success but are these blamers, whiners and complainers. They are rich in cash, but poor in character. Somehow, these morons seem to get away with it, don’t they? It seems somewhat unfair, that they have it and you don’t.
If you are hardworking, honest, and have a sense of responsibility in the things that you do, all it takes is a little fire and passion and drive you toward greater success. I think these are the things that are necessary for you to forge ahead and build any kind of success that you want. But you must be willing to take the hits.
The worst thing that can happen for you is that you ONLY take credit for everything that goes right, and fail to improve from the things that don’t go right. Take responsibility. When I mean responsibility, I’m really talking about the ability to take charge of one’s own decisions, instead of blaming someone else and making excuses. If you don’t achieve something, for heaven’s sake don’t blame anyone else for it.
You need to learn this. Responsibility is one of the most important key facets in NLP. I found that accepting responsibility actually a allows you to develop a greater sense of learning through feedback.
So, if you’re not wealthy yet, take responsibility!
If you don’t have a great family yet, take responsiblity!
If people don’t like you yet, take responsibility!
If you were made bankrupt…(the list goes on, by the way)
Learn something from it.
Once you take a look inside yourself instead of outside of yourself and looking for something to blame, you’ll find that there’s a lot more that you can do to grow as a human being. You become more fulfilled, and experience a greater sense of lightness so that things get better in all aspects of your life.
The basic strategy for taking responsibility is to observe all comments, a visual stimulus, or any other form of sensory feedback and process that by asking the question: “what could I do to improve this?”
The moment you ask this question, it presumes that you already have a clear enough outcome. For most people, the outcome is unclear. You definitely want to have some clarity of your outcomes in order to know how to exactly improve. Once you’re there, you can activate resources that lead you to where it is that you need to go.
I certainly hope that you focus on character instead of cash, wisdom instead of fame, integrity instead of blame. I know that once you’re there, it will definitely help you to make yourself as cash rich and famous as you choose to be.
Most people who are familiar with NLP are able to put other people into a deep state of relaxation.In order for you to know how to do this effectively, you need to understand the use of the Milton model.
Milton Erickson, it is frequently referred to as one of the pillars of NLP.Richard Bandler and John Grinder modeled after Erickson’s approach to hypnosis. And all they did was extract the linguistic categories in his language patterns! The overall result is an astonishing work that has transformed ordinary people into extraordinary hypnotists.
Relaxation is an emotional state that requires individuals to be aware of their body.Very often, the process of deep relaxation requires the initiation of breathing patterns that are different from the current state that they are in.Once you engage in individual in breathing deeply through their nails and breathing out through their mouths, they will begin to regulate their patterns of breathing.This automatically changes their emotional state based on physiological regulation.
The process of pacing and leading is therefore used in order to utilize the physiological change.Phrases such as “as you notice your breathing”, “listening to the sound of my voice”, and “feeling the sensations in your body”, are statements that any individual listening to them cannot deny as an untruth. As such, they are pacing and utilization statements.
In order to deepen states of relaxation, simply link these to suggested outcomes.Read things, “as you notice your breathing, you can begin to go deeper into a state of absolute relaxation”.
This is the reason why most people mistakenly associate NLP with hypnosis. NLP practitioners merely developed the modeling capacity to reverse engineer should notice on their own.For more information about NLP and hypnosis, simply it down to www.WorldofNLP.com.
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